THE JOB INTERVIEW

THINGS NOT TO SAY OR DO AT A JOB INTERVIEW

See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start
laughing uncontrollably.

Ask if there is only one emergency exit, grin and say;
'Boy!, I bet this floor would be in trouble if someone
barricaded that.'

Constantly fidget with underwear waistband, then blurt:
'The strawberry ones are the stickiest, don't ya' think?'

After detailing your greatest achievement, qualify with,
'Of course I was totally hammered at the time.'

Inquire on office policy of friends staying over.

Claim you wouldn't even need a sit-in' job if Al Einstein
hadn't stolen your secret patent for- '2000 Flushes'

Over-emphasize your ability to use a copier.

Ask if it's O.K. that you sit on the floor.

Mention your resume would have been stronger, but you
didn't feel like making anything else up.

Ask secretary if she'll sit on your lap during interview.

Walk into interviewers office with a tape measure, measure
office from a few angles, put away, declare; 'NOW we can
begin.'

Upon walking in to the office for first time ask reception
to hold all your calls.