George Carlin's View on Aging
Do
you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to
get
old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're
so
excited about aging that you think in fractions." How old are
you?" "I'm
four
and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and
a
half,
going on five!
That's the key.
You
get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump
to
the next number, or even a few ahead.
"How
old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey,
you're gonna be 16!
And
then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21.
Even
the words sound like a ceremony . . .
YOU
BECOME 21 - YESSSS!!!
But
then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you
sound
like bad milk. He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no
fun now,
you're just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
You
BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.
Whoa!
Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know
it,
you REACH 50 . . . and your dreams are gone.
But
wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!
So
you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's
a
day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You
get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you
HIT
lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.
And
it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going
backwards; "I was JUST 92."
Then
a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you
become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"
May
you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
(--_--)
And I will
